Worries about dementia, the “normal” life killer !

I Didn’t think I had any worries. Life was good ! Maybe to good !
Because then it started !
I started worry about some times getting lost, the worry about why I’m unable to accomplish things as easy as I used to,
The worry about why I was struggling with money.
It then started to affect my relationship and family life, The worry then started to affect me !
The worry through the The diagnosis procedure, the worry about what was happening to me.
The Worry i had trying not to worry about the worry !
When the diagnosis did come, that was the biggest worry, but not for me.
My poor wife and children are going to have to deal with the worst ! The late stages when I won’t remember, when I might not know them or even care !
I worry about the shouting I do, for almost no reason, the worry about where that patient and
understanding man has gone !
I worry when I hear my wife crying on her own and when I see a tear in my daughter’s eye.
The worry when I’m locked in a room because my hands are full, I worry when I can’t do my own tie or
Asking your children to tie up your laces and to remind me of their name !
I worry when I stagger and can’t see steps, I worry when I fall !
I worry about respite and day care, I worry about where I’m to go !
My head gets so confused and cloudy, my thoughts don’t make sense anymore.
I worry on the days when I’m tired and find it so difficult to talk
Did I say I worry what’s to become of Me, me that’s starting to disappear, day by day,
I worry about the hold Dementia has on me and my family !
I worry about my lack of love that I used to have, I don’t love or feel anymore
I worry that I can cry for no reason and scream for even less !
I worry about the limited future I and my family don’t have any more.
People say don’t worry ! Life goes on ! Living well with it ! And even the joy !
I worry about people not understanding
I worry with dementia, day by day
I’m not supposed to worry, Ive got to get up and beat this disease, I’ve got to live well with it, we don’t suffer, it’s not painful !
Well then I’ll tell you what ! Let’s swop !

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4 thoughts on “Worries about dementia, the “normal” life killer !”

  1. Hi Chris. This is an excellent poetic post – well done. You are an inspiration. I am worried about your worry though – have you tried downloading relaxation apps from the internet or listening to relaxation/meditation CDs? These have really helped me.

  2. One tip apart from daily listening to relaxation/meditation downloads is to only allow yourself to worry at a set time in the day – say 15 minutes at 8am. Another is to confront your worries – I had surgery for breast cancer followed by surgery for endometriosis. Worry is pointless and doesn’t get you anywhere – challenge your mind ‘Have you dealt with difficult experiences before and it all went fine?’. Ask your worry challenging questions and put it on the spot. But the best thing for it is relxation – every day – and plenty of free treats if you’re having a bad day. I made up a ‘rainy day’ box when I had cancer – and did this with the help of friends and family so for bad days I could fish things out for happy memories. You will soon find, if you practice relaxation/meditation that you are not worrying so it is not inevitable.

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